An open discussion with myself on how I feel about the ASPCA

Friends and strangers, I was again having an unsolicited conversation with myself, based off of old comments I shared with my co-worker and other people (mostly those in the commercials) who happened to be present on a rant.

Anyways, I don't think I could ever bring myself to donate money to the ASPCA for two main reasons: 1) I believe in children first, and as long as children hunger kittens can wait; 2) I'm not not spending anything on places that kill animals.  I could see donating to a no-kill shelter, they deserve the money and the help.  

I used to watch Animal Cops and I knew it was time to let the show go when every episode I found myself cursing out the TV because these were real police officers arresting and taking people to court for neglecting their dogs and horses, people who were made to pay heavy fines and court costs and miss work, things which in no way rectified their situations or the underlying issues which caused them to be neglectful or abusive in the first place.  

Not to get me twisted, I love animals very much, and those who know me, or generally of me know at least that much, cats being my favorite of all.  However, it bothers and saddens me that so much energy is spent on discipline with little regard whatsoever placed on prevention and restoration.  Why is it easier to discipline a person than put in the time and energy it takes to resolve the problem or prevent it in the first place?  Here's an example of where Animal Cops failed: 

Two police officers enter the apartment of a young Latino male who has a wife, a small child (under 10), and a dog under a year old.  He beats his dog - mercilessly - but never lays a finger on his wife or child.  The two officers remove the dog he confesses to beating and neglecting, a dog which at the time was tied by what looked like an extension cord in the small dirty kitchen.  Now the dog is gone, but not the man's desire to beat ass.  He has a manageable but certain dillema -- asses must be beaten.  Whose ass will it be?  Will the world of circumstance now give birth to a fucked-up child and a battered woman?  Will another dog step up to the plate and take it like a dog, an animal who in truth will have a death barely noticed by society, but whose life made it possible for a family to thrive?  

Is thrive too strong of a word?  Do they lack?  Do they not suffer from what they witness with their eyes?  Do their hearts break for an animal who helps them yet is one they feel helpless to protect?  Will his ultimate death cause the father to seek help and realize what he is doing to himself and his loved ones?  Does he have no hope because he beat a dog?  Is he then unworthy of redemption because of common minds and hardheartedness?  Does his desire to harm and terrify die out when the soul leaves the dog because of his hands?  Does his family see that change in him, his inner sorrow, the soft but heavy heart that's born through death?  

I don't know.  The officers took the dog and called the problem solved.  It is equivalent to delivering food by planes to starving children in Africa, and then calling Africa healed.  It is like placing a child in foster care and calling the situation familial.  It is like laying a blanket in the snow and calling ones' self warm.  

Donate to save a life.  Donate to improve the view of life of whomever you seek to help.  Dogs have souls too.  Important ones. And they are aware of themselves as well as things around and outside of themselves.  For a thing to be alive there must be spirit within it, the animatia, the cur, the breath.

Transitioning to raw vegan living.  Not because of some self-righteous view on animals or food.  In fact, I fantasize frequently about revenge eating a shark in the ocean, and feeding chinks of its dead body to sharks, and taking the biggest bite I can with by bare teeth out of its tail and fin and ribs for all my fallen brothers and sisters that a shark dared to eat.  I'm transitioning because I have a life goal of living to 113, and at the least 103, and I'd like to make it there healthy, of a sound mind and body, and not incontinent or with assisted walking, and it is possible, but I need to treat my body well to do so.  

The Introduction of the Introduction of Myself

Hello, friends and strangers.  This is my very first entry of my very first blog.  I am by no means a professional blogger, and in truth, have been putting this off as long as possible from fear and indecisiveness. What I can say, is that I have some of the most well-rounded arguments with myself - and win - on a regular basis.  I also lose at times, but it's always a matter of perception, and sometimes I do not defend as passionately as I aggress.  

Recently this year I've found myself asking me on numerous occasions, "What if we are experiencing the end of the world, and it looks like this, and nobody else is noticing how strange things are."  Of course, that's a loaded, mentally unwravelling question.  This, I realize, is probably the part where I introduce myself.  

My name is Melissa.  I am a currently unpublished writer.  I am 30. I had one semester left before receiving my BA in English at SIUC, which had I not gotten off track, would have been completed in '07, but was somehow dragged out to '09, and here I am now trying to reapply for Spring '13, so that's a mouthful.  

I have an Xbox360 and  PS3, good game library, and love my HuluPlus and Netflix. I'm very interested in incorporating raw fruits and vegetables into my diet, and have been reading a lot on raw nutrition.  I'm also in the beginning phase of growing my relaxed hair to its natural length.  I've had so many episodes of hardship and triumph in my life, and they have moulded me into a driven, independent human.  

I enjoy reading The Kephalaia Gnostica, written by Evagrius Ponticus, and Egyptian Christian monk who lived and died between 345 - 399AD.  His is the only supplemental reading I do outside of the bible; his words are undiluted, and he speaks in a manner which is not deceptive and reveals inner wisdom like no writer I've ever encountered.  I am not as read as I'd like to be in his work, or others for that matter, but I feel a deep kindredness towards him as a man who loves God and whom had a deep devotion towards Him.  

I enjoy high fantasy (fantasia), and my favorite TV shows right now are Once Upon A Time and Grimm.  I aspire to write my own show one day.  My movie genre is supernatural thriller, and my fiction focuses often on sexual deviance; my subject matter is the human experience.